Cow in Training

  Well everyone, I am on a train right now headed to New York City. I am coming back from Greenville, and even though some people bothered me a little bit on my train trips, I am glad that I took the train and had nice things to think about on both 15 hour train rides.  My trip there took place on a day that my old college was having a university-wide fund raiser, and I got to keep checking their websites to see the donations.  And then they met their goal, and it was exciting like a football game.  And then this morning when the trip back got a little tiresome, it turned out that William and Kate from England were having another baby so it was another thing to keep track of and pass the time being happy about.

    Right now the train is going through some hills and forests, and I am seeing a lot of cows.  The cows are just sitting around, and it makes me feel good about myself because sitting around is one of the main things that I like to do. And it is the main thing I did on my trip. I was there to check on my parents and I could tell they were doing pretty good, so I mainly focused on eating and sleeping.  And honestly I ate so much and slept so much that I feel kind of bad about it, but these cows are reminding me that it is good to not show off by working too hard and instead to just sit around and let life pass you by.  In fact, I have been looking for jobs online and I am wondering if that could be a good search is to just look up the word cow and see if anyone is hiring people to be cows part time.

Marshmallow Fluff as Gourmet Food

Well hi, everyone, time for a blog post.  I just ate some yummy food and had a good day.  The yummy food was a smores dessert.  And earlier today I met with a great mental health person who has helped me with my apartment.  And before that I did my taxes.  But I had a little bit of a disheartening tax situation when the online software I used said they could not e-file for me because of the type of return, and then when I tried to mail it, the info said I had to e-file because I used software.  Well I don't appreciate being in that situation.  And the music at UPS center where I used the computer was horrible as usual.  I think they would probably say I am racist for not appreciating their "urban" mix that they have selected, but I think it is racist of them to assume that anyone, but especially their predicted demographic for that store, would like for every song they hear to have lyrics like "I wanna be your sex slave."  But maybe I am the target demographic and just don't know what is good for me and my culture that has one in three sexual abuse rates for children.

   Anyway, that is kind of weird, I guess, but in general I am thankful to be alive and to so far have a place to live and be mostly safe.  A guy who sometimes follows me in my neighborhood actually jumped the subway turnstile when I tried to get away from him a couple of days ago, so I am being extra careful. I have an easy life for a few days, so I just need to not do anything stupid like fall down in my apartment or do a weird social thing that makes me lose all my facebook friends.  I did lose several people this week, but I think it was because of the controversial facebook privacy investigation which seems to have gone nowhere, despite the fact that facebook is not just collecting info on what people like and buy, but actually claims to keep track of what people have "seen."  That really does call for some regulation, but the perpetual political messes are proving to be too big of a distraction for people to actually keep up with facebook's creeping creepiness.

Sci Fi Mice Episode

Well everyone, I hate to use this blog as a place for legal documentation, but I did vacuum and mop behind my shelves today, which is one of the main areas in my apartment that I have seen some mice visiting sometimes.  So my apartment is becoming less and less of an X files situation and is starting to resemble just a messy apartment that people should not be kicked out of for any reason other than a property management company's attempt to evade rent stabilization laws so they can get a new tenant and raise the rent in order to transform the community into an aggressive market share rent zone that destroys New York City and eventually the rest of the country and world, but not before space colonization has been made possible and there is a new Noah's ark story with 7 billion of each species being loaded onto spaceships that hopefully have room for me and all the mice that I have befriended over the past year by controversially doing something that many people do not believe in, which is sharing cookies. And people might say that having cookies in my apartment was actually the great sin that I should be evicted for, but I think that if the apartment building has a mice problem, then really the people who distract the mice from the wires with a few messy cookie habits have actually probably helped out a little bit and should not have to pay any more rent ever again.

Introduction to Pest Control

Well hi everyone, today is Saturday.  It is a nice rainy day and I have a couple of days where I am not volunteering.  But what I am doing is getting my apartment ready for a pest control treatment and it is not easy.  I signed a contract agreeing to clear out cabinets and do other specific preparations, and I feel like my apartment is so inherently messy that they will postpone the treatment no matter what.  But I just had this little idea of turning my couch on its side like so it is a tall tower kind of and clearing out the mess underneath it and vacuuming.  I think that the couch sitting on its side when pest control gets here will make it seem like the whole apartment is all upturned and ready for mice traps and bug spray to be administered.  Don't y'all think that is a good idea?  Like okay I do my best to get everything ready and then focus my main attention on simply putting the couch on its side.  It is a small couch.  But I am scared that when I do that a whole bunch of mice will scamper out like in that movie "Ratatouille" when the ceiling falls down and there are so many mice.  That really could be the kind of situation that I am dealing with. But wouldn't it be best for me to know that ahead of time? Well maybe, but it might be a special memory for the pest control guy if I wait and upturn the couch when he is here, watch a hundred mice scamper out, and then say, "These mice are like family to me."

Pizza Delivery

    Well everyone, it seems that there has been a miracle which is that it turns out there is still a Papa Johns pizza that delivers to my address.  The other one disappeared and I kept trying to order from a different one that doesn't deliver to my address.  Well it made me so sad and I almost couldn't believe it and wondered if they had closed the neighborhood store on purpose after reading a blog post about how I thought it was not cool how they make everyone applying for jobs there agree to waive their court rights after being hired and have their disputes settled by private arbitration paid for by Papa Johns (Pizzeria Law).

   Anyway this is very exciting and it turns out that Papa Johns was just hiding from me for a while to give me a chance to go on a diet.  Well it did work a little bit but now it is time to eat a pizza.  I am not going to cry and hug the delivery man when he gets here because you are not supposed to worship pizza and care about it more than your own life and salvation, and more than your friends and family, and more than the very life and breath that you would sacrifice in a heartbeat for just one more bite of pizza at any moment even if it means never seeing another human face again.