The ghost of Christmas present

   Well hi everyone, did y'all have a good Christmas?  I had a pretty good Christmas even though I did not send as many gifts to people this year.  And I volunteered on Christmas Eve but did not have a good attitude because we had to wash some of the same dishes several times because some people did not do the best they could.  But it was probably their way of telling Santa to give their presents to someone else.

   Anyway I still have some presents to send to my nieces and just had second thoughts about what I did for them, which was essentially give them each a small suitcase full of one dollar bills, gold one dollar coins, and other mafia reminiscent items like dice and poker chips. It was a fun present, especially since me and my sister grew up watching TV together and have an appreciation for suitcases full of money. But I took apart some cheap metal art cases to do it, and had one for myself which I disassembled today and saw how cool the cases that I took apart were.  I mean they were cool art sets, and when I was in town visiting the nieces, I asked them what else they wanted for Christmas, and they said art supplies.  So I just had a little section of time where I was questioning my choices, but I think that I did okay and I will send them some art kits soon and send the supplies that I took out of the other art kits.

   But anyway, I have discovered in adulthood that one of the great things that you can do is cash out some of your money in one dollar bills and use it to feel rich in different tricky ways.  You can do this by carrying a thick wad of money everywhere you go, hiding ones and fives in all your clothes so you are always finding money, or my new favorite, assembling a suitcase full of money as part of your savings plan.  It really is just like the TV shows, and even though at Christmas, everyone has just been reminded about how uncool Scrooge is, counting stacks of gold coins is actually almost as satisfying as counting more stacks of gold coins.

These pants are giving me dementia.

I mention my new pants in the next post also but I just want to say here too that I got some new pants today that aren't the greatest pants I have ever had and I do not feel like myself in them and I am on a train right now and I think I am at risk for wandering off and not knowing who I am.  Like I could get off the train at a random stop and not even know my name because these pants are not like the pants that I normally wear.  I knew that they would be different because I usually get regular pants but these are slim so they make me look and feel so stupid that I think it could be hard to remember things like my name or my address or something more important which is to never buy these kinds of pants again.

A long post from some long days

   Well hi everyone, this is a post I am writing on the train and will post later.  I am sitting on the train now in NYC about to leave for Greenville.  I am going to an important family occasion.  I have not been in a good state of mind for a few days and I have cursed at some people.  You are probably saying into your computer, well what seems to be the trouble.  Well I will tell you.  Friday I was on a subway and thought I was at my stop so I got off the train and then realized it wasn't my stop so I got back on the train but realized I had passed my stop so I needed to get off the train again and the doors were closing so I hurried and held the doors open so I could get through.  Well the drivers do not like it when you do that and the guy started closing the door on me repeatedly.  Well I have neck problems so that is not good and I chased him down yelling at him as the train was leaving. It was kind of like the Superman scene where Superman runs faster than the train except I did not catch up with the train driver and I was grabbing my neck in exaggerated pain. I do think that train drivers should get in trouble for hurting people on purpose and I told on him.  Anyway the next day I volunteered in the Bronx and I was working on a little food task and a guy blasted some embarrassing music right in my ears and it hurt me so much. It made me suicidal and it made me feel like I can never work or volunteer again.  But I have volunteered a lot this year and only had a few experiences like that but to me it ruins my life when things like that happen and treatment like that is one of the reasons I haven't been able to work.  Anyway I prayed some mean prayers over the weekend and sent a little note about the situation.  It is true that addressing things directly usually prevents a lot of resentful grumbling but sometimes it seems impossible to do the confrontations that help you feel okay and prevent further issues.

   Anyway Sunday I had a busy day and then took the guinea pigs to the pet sitter and on the way home I stopped at a restaurant that I had vowed to eat at someday and then I walked on to the train station and gave my leftovers to a guy at the train station.  Well it was a great bag of leftovers and I was happy to share except later realized that that guy might have known I had eaten there and been part of some people who tracked me for fifteen blocks to get the food.  That sounds paranoid doesn't it?  Well a lot of homeless people in New York have certain methods to get cash and they text each other and keep track of who gives what and they conveniently show up in your train car or at certain corners because other people let them know several blocks away that you were walking down the street.  Anyway some people in my neighborhood do that to me too and I already have a lot of problems so I am thinking about not giving any food or money to people any more.  It is kind of sad because I do think a lot of people not only need but deserve cash handouts but I am not going to reward people for being part of a whole network of people that tracks me and follows me.

    Anyway today I went to a certain store that rhymes with "Sold Gravy" (they probably google themselves and sue innocent bloggers) to get some clean pants because the laundromat in my neighborhood got burnt in a fire so I am a little behind on laundry chores.  Well they no longer have my size and oddly haven't had my size there since I sent an email complaining about something several months ago.  But I don't know if they would have targeted me that much but anyway I ended up getting a pair of "slim" pants and they are horrible!  All I can do is be happy for the Wal Mart White Stag brand that now has a chance to really compete based on appearance instead of predatory price slashing and worker's soul slashing. But anyway maybe people won't recognize me in this outfit so they won't be able to target me and keep treating me so bad and hurting me on purpose.  I do believe I am on the way to becoming a Batman Villain and it seems that part of my costume will be these horrible slim pants.

Association

I am on a trip and on the train we passed an apartment building called Locust Point.  Well I am not a marketer but aren't locusts some kind of insect pest?  I am just wondering and maybe that helps people sign up for apartments there because they think they might be getting a deal.  Or maybe it is from a property company that has two buildings and they named one Locust Point and then charge everyone a million dollars a month at the other one.  It's a clever little scheme, really, and it kind of reminds me of a lot of rent and property schemes, though in NYC I think just the word Locusts is already a reminder of the real estate business.